When you look at your parents, to a degree you’re looking at yourself.
When I was about twenty-five I began noticing that I had inherited some of my father mannerisms. Initially this came a surprise and then a concern, because when you see one you become acutely aware of other mannerisms too. In my case it wasn’t entirely bad news, however I gained firsthand experience that I cannot escape the image of my parents that is forged into who I am.
For many people this isn’t good news at all. For them there is a constant need to escape parental images that plague their minds like some past horror story. The very idea that they might be like their parents in any small way is simply anathema. Yet the sad reality is, we cannot fully escape our parentage.
There is hope though!
All of us view the world through a set of lenses (glasses if you like) that bring a degree of clarity to the world. They give definition to some very important aspects of life, like our self-perception, our view of others and our response to the kaleidoscope of things life throws our way. But what happens when the lens is faulty, altering our view so what we see isn’t really how things are?
The hope rests in the knowledge that it is quite possible to change our glasses but only once we have discovered them to be inadequate. Now that sounds simple, yet even though we know our view is skewed, we can refuse to change the old comfortable view. Strange as it may seem, a faulty and even damaging view of the world can become something of a security blanket. After all, if we heal our vision of the world, what will our excuse be for hatred, anger, revenge or even laziness?
If our view of the world changes, then we must change too. An old parental image can no longer imprison us.
Christian belief is no different. The Lords Prayer starts out, “Our father in heaven…”, which underpins the idea that we have divine parentage as well as biological. It’s reasonable then to assume that our image of “God the Father” will determine our attitude and image of ourselves in this world. If God is hateful, vengeful and punishing, it’s reasonable to see how we transform these adjectives into adverbs that describe our behaviour.
Yet like the images we have of our parents, the lens can be changed, if we are willing. And that is central question.
We all need to wrestle with our image of God because that image is foundational to every other Christian belief we might hold.
God is not vengeful or hating of humanity. God’s one desire is restoration of the human heart with God’s presence in the world. Jesus is the embodiment of the living God in human form. What do you see in him? Unreserved grace? If you can’t see it, you might just need a new set of specs. If you look at your image of God, you may be looking at an image of yourself.
© Digby Wilkinson 2007